It's Been Like.....FOREVER

My goodneess it sure has been a long while since I posted here. I suppose life just got busy, and adulting took over. It has been a whirlwind of a year, and I am coming to realize that I have really stopped focusing on myself too much. Not sure how or why, but I got into a self depricating rut, and now, it's time to get past it. I have gained a lot of weight, and I am not happy about it!

I decided back in February to start really focusing on my health again, but I haven't been able to lose any weight. In fact, I have GAINED 14lbs since then. To say I am frustrated is an understatment. All the while, trying to help my children understand that I want to be healthy.....yet they both know I am ashamed of my body. It has effected my married too. As if being apart from my husband wasn't hard enough, I don't enjoy sending him sexy pics when we are apart. When we are together, I just feel dumpy and awkward. I have stepped up my workouts, but sometimes, working 12hour shifts makes it difficult.

I realized yesterday that I really need to start cracking down on my nutirtion. I can't say that I have been eating terribly, but I could do better. So, I have decided to start writing about my weight loss journey. Totally cliche, I know, but it is a struggle. My family has a bad history of obesity, diabetes, heart disease, and more. I want my words to one day empower my own child to be strong in their choices.

So, all that said. Today was hard! I got up this morning with a renewed sense of self, only to discover I had nothing that wasn't processed and full of carbs, so I skipped it. I am watching a friend's dogs while she is out of town, so I grabbed my shopping list and decided I would head to the store as soon as I was done with them. But, things took me longer than I had expected becuase those dogs are so dang sweet! With good intentions in hand, I set off! I didn't do too bad actually, with the exception of some popcorn that I really like. I also made a turkey sandwich today, substituting the bread with a cucumber. I'll have to take a picture of it. For now, tomorrow is a new day.